To some women, the thought of pregnancy after a miscarriage is horrifying. I know it was for me. After multiple pregnancy losses, I’d tremble with an excited-nervousness after each positive pregnancy test.
I was like a confused bobble-head doll struggling to adjust to my inconsistent feelings. Not only was trying to conceive (TTC) a drag. But once the results came in, it stirred a pool of wild emotions within me.
Now, I was happy but then I’d remember previous losses and begin to wonder if the same fate would happen to this baby. It became so exhausting that I couldn’t fully enjoy my pregnancies. I was walking on egg shells each time.
I realized this was a problem for me when people would ask me how I was feeling. I’d reply with the normal physical pregnancy symptoms I felt like: nausea, fatigue, sleepiness and hormonal.
But emotionally, I was a real wreck. My brain was tired from constantly wondering if everything in my body was okay. I was constantly thinking about how cautious I should be.
And everything freaked me out. I wondered, “When I use the restroom, will I see blood?” “Is that gassy/cramping feeling the start of another miscarriage?” “Am I feeling enough “pregnancy symptoms?”‘ I was a mess.
I’m sure many women can agree that pregnancy after miscarriage is emotionally and physiologically draining. But, I’d like to ease your mind a little by sharing a few things you should remember if you’ve experienced pregnancy loss and are pregnant.
1. Not all spotting is bad. A friend of mine experienced bleeding during her first trimester and delivered a healthy baby girl. According to E-medicine Health, it’s common to have light spotting in the first trimester.
Not all bloody shows indicate a miscarriage. Don’t stress every time you have to wee-wee. Just go and release yourself. However, if you do have any spotting or bleeding, contact your physician.
2. Not all cramping is related to miscarriage. It is common to experience flatulence or gassiness during the first trimester. I remember eating some seafood that made the side of my stomach hurt terribly.
I needed everyone to back away! My husband laughed, but inwardly I couldn’t. Immediately, I began to think the worst. It is common to experience gas. But if you’re experiencing menstrual type cramping and see spotting, contact your physician.
3. Not all pregnancies are created equal. It doesn’t matter how many pregnancies you have, they will not be the same. You may or may not experience the same symptoms. With my son, I experienced great fatigue. With my daughter, I was more tired.
It was different each time. Instead of considering the symptoms, relax and enjoy the beauty of pregnancy. If you feel fewer symptoms, you’re one blessed lady. And if you’re concerned, call your doctor to discuss your concerns.
4. Talking through your feelings may help. Whether it’s with your spouse or with a friend, talking about how nervous you are can be greatly beneficial to you. I openly shared my concerns with my husband when we were expecting our son.
I shared how I was a nervous wreck. He was able to help me sort my feelings and emotions and support me through our pregnancy. I also joined an online support group of moms who experienced miscarriage and they helped me get through tough moments. Talking helps eases the heart and sooth any doubts.